Sexuality in Postsecret

In Arlene Stein's article, "Three Models of Sexuality: Drive, Identities, and Practices", she states that sexuality is conformed mostly by society and what is thought to be right and wrong in terms of social standards. While she also mentions that sexuality can be affected by family and religion, she notes that sex is a social construction, and that sexual orientation is also socially constructed. This explains why the postcards from Postsecret seem shameful or guilt ridden. Because people feel that society won't accept their secrets, they send them into Postsecret to get them off of their chests and perhaps to see if anyone else can relate to them.

For instance, this postcard seems like the artist was ashamed of their feelings. It might sound silly and strange, but why has society made "watching men eat meat" twisted and not sexually arousing?

Because society has constructed a definition of what is sexy and what isn't, feelings like the postcard to the left are turned into secrets and embarrassments. This photo below, shows the shame someone feels for fantasizing about breast feeding. The socially constructed ideas for what is "hot" and what is not has rejected the idea that it is OK to fantasize about breast feeding. Thus, this person feels shame and guilt for having these feelings- turning them into a secret.

Other fantasies that are rejected by society are those of gay or lesbian people - or those in between. On the right depicts a person who's identity includes both lesbian and straight sexuality. This person, whose gender is unknown to the reader, is clearly upset that he or she is having these feelings because if their husband found out, he would probably feel hurt and betrayed. The creator of these postcards is not the only one affected by these secrets. If these postcards weren't anonymous, they would probably hurt more than just the secret keeper. Because society has built up such expectations and constructions, everyone who knew these people would be seriously affected by these secret identities - secrets like the postcard below. While some of these postcards portray adultery which is not commonly accepted, they also show people unhappy with their sexual orientation or unhappy in a relationship that perhaps was forced upon them by the standards of the community they live in.

The gay and lesbian community also shows the pressures of society. In the image below, a gay person has shown how he feels society treats him according to his sexual orientation. I wonder what this postcard really means. Is he saying that society as a whole would deny that they think of him differently because he's gay? Because this is a secret, maybe society doesn't know how it accepts gay people, or how it doesn't accept gay people. Postsecret is a complex medium in which people can voice how society views them and their decisions.

Postsecret also portrays many stereotypes of sexuality of men and women. This postcard on the right makes something that is usually a male pleasure into something that is OK for females to do as well. By putting a voice and image to sexuality, the postcards on Postsecret cross boundaries that have been created by society.